reimagine me

Reimagine Relationships

Posted by elle  ·  Undated
reimagine me: Reimagine Relationships

Nothing is more important than learning to master your relationships—romantic, family, business, and social. Our most desired human emotion is that of connection with others. Relationships shape our character, values, beliefs and the quality of our lives

Reimagine your relationship in 6 days

Day 1  Know the values and rules of the people whom you share a relationship

People can love each other but if they consistently break the rules of someone they care about, there are going to be upsets and stress in the relationship. Every upset you’ve ever had with someone else has been a rules upset and when people become intimately involved it is inevitable that some of their rules will clash. By knowing someone’s rules you can head off these challenges in advance.

Day 2  Give instead of receive        

Most people enter a relationship in order to get something: they’re trying to find someone who’s going to make them feel good. The only way a relationship will last is if you see your relationships as a place that you go to give and not a place you go to to take

Day 3  Eliminate problems before they balloon     

For a relationship to be nurtured there are certain things to look for – and to look out for. In her book How to Make Love all the Time Dr Barbara De Angelis identifies four phases that can kill a relationship: Resistance, Resentment, Rejection and Repression. The key to prevent these for Rs is to communicate clearly upfront. Make sure your rules are known and can be met and use transformational vocabulary such as I’d prefer if you instead of I can’t stand if you

Day 4  Make your relationships your highest priority 

Don't let your relationships take a back seat to other things that are more urgent that happen during your day as this will cause levels of passion and emotional intensity to gradually start drifting away. Don’t ever get caught up in the law of familiarity

Day 5 Focus each day on making it better

If you want a relationship to last never ever threaten the relationship itself. Don’t ever say If you do this, I’m leaving – this only creates fear in both partners. Make this a rule, no matter how angry or hurt you feel. If we constantly focus on our fear of a relationships being over, we’ll begin to do things unconsciously to sabotage it so that we can extract ourselves before we get too entwined and true pain results. Focus on where you’re going with your relationships, not what you fear

Day 6   Reinforce your feelings of connection and renew your feelings for intimacy and attraction

Become fully associated with the privilege of sharing life with your partner, feel the pleasure intensely and continually anchor it in your nervous system. Engage in a never ending quest to find new ways to surprise each other. If you don’t habituation will set in and you’ll take each other for granted. Finding and creating these moments every day will make your relationship legendary.

"We waste time looking for the perfect lover, instead of creating the perfect love.” - Tim Robbins

 

From The Giant Within - Tony Robbins

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